I'm on a "budget"
I have been observing the travelling for three and half weeks now and I must say they are a rather odd and unusual species. Everyone has the idea that they want to "experience as much of the world as they possible can". However they appear to be lacking the capital in order to do so.
Thre traveller is fully aware of this dialema and follows the below guide in order to see them through this terrible ordeal.
1. Food
"Can I please have Granola and Greek yoghurt?" I'm afraid those days are over, this isn't Surrey anymore. You can now purchase the 1 dollar Super Noodles provided at your local 7- Eleven. The traveller has no concept of time whether it is 20:00pm or 7:00am you can trust Super Noodles to see you through your day.
Alternatively, some travellers do not think the above is a very nutritious breakfast therefore you can always eat a bowl of green beans that you have left over from last nights dinner. I must warn you apparently this is a more upmarket way of living. Be careful you don't break the bank with those greens, you have a sky dive to pay for.
2. Drink
If a traveller is feeling particularly parched on this fine evening they congregate outside the bottle shop to purchase a bottle of the finest "Goon". For those of you who aren't familiar with this drink I will explain. Goon is the Aussie term for cheap, unwanted wine.The British equivalent would be a bottle of Lambrini, however the dichotomy being the market this product attracts.
Goon does not appeal to the local fifteen year old playing dizzy dinosaurs in the park trying to get the attention of the football boys. Instead Goon is targeted at the 26 year old male with a classics degree who can't spring for a bottle of red as he spent all his money on whale watching earlier that day, before realising that was a complete waste of time.
3. Accommodation
You are condemned to a life of cold showers, 16 bed dorms and communal kitchens.
However I did hear a tale of how one traveller had an over night stay at an accommodation that could quite possibly put the Hilton out of business.
There was air conditioning, clean bed sheets, and even a free breakfast but the best part of was this accommodation was that it was completely free. Where is this haven you ask?
The hospital!
Most travellers only dream of staying at a place like this. I hear it is difficult to get a bed there but if you hit your head of on surf board enough times I'm sure you can claim you have mild concussion and you should go straight through.
4. Phrases
You will not ever catch any travelling utter the line "Can I pay by card please?" Who do you think you are? That's a 2 dollar charge have you lost your mind!
5. Transport
The traveller goes from destination to destination via foot or public transport. It does not matter how many carrier bags or how big the travellers backpack is they have developed a talent for morphing into a mule. Taxis are out of the question no matter how far the distance.
I of course, observe all of this while waiting for my uber in my swede wedges after chowing down to civilised sushi dinner and glass of Prosecco with a shot of elderflower -no ice. Which yes that's right, I paid for by card because you can take the girl out of the city but you cannot take the city out of the girl!
#FOMO_is_amongst_us
Thre traveller is fully aware of this dialema and follows the below guide in order to see them through this terrible ordeal.
1. Food
"Can I please have Granola and Greek yoghurt?" I'm afraid those days are over, this isn't Surrey anymore. You can now purchase the 1 dollar Super Noodles provided at your local 7- Eleven. The traveller has no concept of time whether it is 20:00pm or 7:00am you can trust Super Noodles to see you through your day.
Alternatively, some travellers do not think the above is a very nutritious breakfast therefore you can always eat a bowl of green beans that you have left over from last nights dinner. I must warn you apparently this is a more upmarket way of living. Be careful you don't break the bank with those greens, you have a sky dive to pay for.
2. Drink
If a traveller is feeling particularly parched on this fine evening they congregate outside the bottle shop to purchase a bottle of the finest "Goon". For those of you who aren't familiar with this drink I will explain. Goon is the Aussie term for cheap, unwanted wine.The British equivalent would be a bottle of Lambrini, however the dichotomy being the market this product attracts.
Goon does not appeal to the local fifteen year old playing dizzy dinosaurs in the park trying to get the attention of the football boys. Instead Goon is targeted at the 26 year old male with a classics degree who can't spring for a bottle of red as he spent all his money on whale watching earlier that day, before realising that was a complete waste of time.
3. Accommodation
You are condemned to a life of cold showers, 16 bed dorms and communal kitchens.
However I did hear a tale of how one traveller had an over night stay at an accommodation that could quite possibly put the Hilton out of business.
There was air conditioning, clean bed sheets, and even a free breakfast but the best part of was this accommodation was that it was completely free. Where is this haven you ask?
The hospital!
Most travellers only dream of staying at a place like this. I hear it is difficult to get a bed there but if you hit your head of on surf board enough times I'm sure you can claim you have mild concussion and you should go straight through.
4. Phrases
You will not ever catch any travelling utter the line "Can I pay by card please?" Who do you think you are? That's a 2 dollar charge have you lost your mind!
5. Transport
The traveller goes from destination to destination via foot or public transport. It does not matter how many carrier bags or how big the travellers backpack is they have developed a talent for morphing into a mule. Taxis are out of the question no matter how far the distance.
I of course, observe all of this while waiting for my uber in my swede wedges after chowing down to civilised sushi dinner and glass of Prosecco with a shot of elderflower -no ice. Which yes that's right, I paid for by card because you can take the girl out of the city but you cannot take the city out of the girl!
#FOMO_is_amongst_us